i ran across

a song that i've loved dearly since the first time i heard it over a year ago.
though im not too fond of the band, or some of the members in it, the lyrics have a lot of meaning, and a lot of great memories for me. when i get the chance to, i will type out the lyrics and post them on here, but since its nearly 4 am, and im going to be waking up in about 5 hours, i will do that another night.

i've been incredibly lonely and partially depressed. im still not dealing with somethings the healthiest way or even at all. you would think since its been almost 8 full months, i would know how to live with out you, but its harder than i had expected. so many things remind me of you and everything you taught me. you were the most beautiful person, inside and out, that has ever entered my life. i know all you wanted was for me to be happy, healthy, and safe, and thats what i am doing. i've made so many changes in my life since you left, and the only reason i realized i needed to changed these things, was because of you. I can not thank you enough for what you have done for me and for just being the amazing person you were. i love you so much and i miss you more as the days pass by.


i laugh, because it reminds me everything will be okay.

i love you.
so much.